


Unbreak My Heart

by JJBashir



Series: The Aislinn MacMurdo Chronicles [13]
Category: seaQuest
Genre: F/M, No for real he fucked up, Season/Series 02, Tim done fucked up, pre-ten year gap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:53:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23722663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JJBashir/pseuds/JJBashir
Summary: Linn's reaction to the events of Dagger Redux.  Hint: it's not good
Relationships: Tim O'Neill/Aislinn MacMurdo, Tim O'Neill/Original Female Character(s)
Series: The Aislinn MacMurdo Chronicles [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/60416
Comments: 1





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The fic is inspired by the lyrics to the song 'Unbreak My Heart'
> 
> _Unbreak my heart,_  
>  _say you'll love me again._  
>  _Undo the hurt you brought_  
>  _when you walked out the door,_  
>  _and walked out of my life._  
>  _Unshed these tears,_  
>  _I've cried so many nights_  
>  _Unbreak my heart_

"I don't care WHAT you guys think," Lt. Jim Brody said, checking over his diagnostic of the weapons conn. "She's gonna understand."

"Not a chance," Warrant Officer Miguel Ortiz said, checking his WSKRS readings. "I'm his best friend, and I don't understand. OK, he thinks his career is kaput, down the toilet. WHATEVER. But to up and leave and not even wait to say goodbye to her?" Ortiz shook his head. "There's something else going on."

They'd just been through a difficult time on the boat. Tim O'Neill had decided he was making a great mistake with his life and his career. He took off, determined to become an artist. He'd been kidnapped by a renegade GELF and nearly gotten himself killed. It didn't help that he did this without telling anyone. Including his girlfriend, who'd been on leave

Commander Jonathan Ford was sitting in the captain's chair. "The long and the short of it is that we've got to explain to her WHAT happened," he said gloomily. "And you know what her reaction is gonna be to that."

"Gonna be to WHAT?" they all heard behind them. A woman in the seaQuest navy blue jumpsuit regarded her friends on the Bridge.

"Linn!!" Miguel exclaimed. He hoped that he could keep the hint of panic out of his voice "What are you doing here!? You--you're supposed to be in Scotland!"

Lt. Linn MacMurdo shook her head. "I work here, ye daft boyo," she said, a hint of her Scottish brogue slipping into her words. "And I finished my evals early. I just pulled in a minute or so ago, an' they told me that they needed me up here. What's up? Where's Tim?"

Ford, Brody and Ortiz all looked at each other. "Um...well," Ford began.

Linn smacked her head. "Och, don't tell me he's off in Medbay AGAIN?"

Brody shook his head. "Ah, well, Mac, yeah he is," he stammered, "A lot happened while you were in Edinburgh--"

Her eyes scanned the console. "No kidding. This thing is a mess!! Tim's gonna be furious when--"

"About Tim," Ford said shakily. "There's something we should--ah-"

"Hey gang!" Seaman Tony Piccolo chirped as he came on duty. "I still can't believe that about O'Neill." He was oblivious to his friends waving furiously, and pointing towards Linn. They stopped the minute she turned. "I mean--first he quits, then he wants to come back--ohhhhh, Linnie, hi," he squeaked, catching sight of the green eyed Communications officer. "How was your trip, Mac?"

"C'mere Tony," she said, crooking her finger at him.

He approached warily.

She grabbed his nose as soon as he was in range. "Ye have fifteen seconds to tell me where the hell Timothy is," she growled. "Talk fast."

"Tim--he left--quit the Navy--" Tony sputtered. "Then Mariah--the Dagger--she caught him--but now he's back--leggo alreddy I can't breathe!"

She let go of his nose. "Slowly and in small words, Piccolo," she said, her accent completely gone. "What happened?"

The door of Linn's quarters flew open. She slammed the door shut, and threw her hat across the room. How COULD he? How could he just LEAVE like that--with no word to her at all?? She threw herself on the bed and started to sob. He didn't love her anymore. Tim had fallen out of love with her---and she couldn't handle it. Why else would he run away and not even tell her--or call her to let her know what had happened? She sobbed, her heart shattered and aching. She knew something was wrong...she could feel it---it was why she had come back as soon as she could. She had even canceled several days worth of meetings with her doctorate advisor, pleading some emergency on the seaQuest to get back. She'd pushed the launch to its max. She knew she was right when she got back and almost no one would look at her...or talk to her about Tim.

The door clanged. "Linn--Linn, it's Mig."

"Go away," she sobbed.

"C'mon, Linn" the Sensor Officer pleaded. "Lemme in."

"Go AWAY, Miguel!" she screamed between sobs. "And take HIM with ye!"

Miguel Ortiz looked at Tim O'Neill. "Shit," he said. "She knows us both too well."

A whole line of people came by her door that afternoon. She sent them all away with various degrees of swearing in between her admonitions to leave her be. By the time Jim Brody came by, she had just about cried herself out.

"Aislinn?" he said, knocking on her door. "Linn, you OK in there?"

The door opened. Jim was shocked. She looked---FINE. Her hair was neatly brushed back in its ponytail, her uniform neat and straight. No teary streaks down her face, not red blotches, nothing.

"Yes, James?" she replied. "What kin I do for ye?"

Jim turned his head slightly. "We were all kinda worried about you, kiddo," he said, laying a hand on her shoulder.

She smiled briefly. "I'm FINE, James," she said.

Jim's ears pricked up. She almost never called him by his full first name. She almost never called _anybody_ by their full first name. Only when you knew she was on the verge of losing total emotional control--or playing the biggest joke in the world on you--did she use that tone of voice. "Ah--you know--Tim was worried about--"

He saw her eyes flash into a dayglo green, before softening--an iota. "Quite honestly, I'm hardly concerned with what Leftenant O'Neill cares about," she said.

_Oh Shit_ , Jim thought to himself. Royal Navy pronunciation of Tim's rank gave one more clue to her mood. It wasn't a good one.

"And actually," she continued before Bordy could continue, "I'd rather not speak about him, unless it's work." She threw her shoulders back. "So, what can I do for you, James?"

"Well?" Miguel demanded. He, Tony, Lucas and Jonathan were all sitting at a table in the mess hall.

"Pissed is the understatement of the century," Brody said, sliding into the empty seat next to Piccolo. "If she called me 'James' one more time, I was going to click my heels together and ask her if she wanted some tea." He looked around at his friends. "We'd better warn 'Leftenant' O'Neill to stay the hell away from her or a couple of days yet."

"LEFTENANT?" Ford said. "Oh boy..."

"You said it," Jim said. "I haven't seen her this mad EVER...not even when she hauled off and smacked Lonnie that one time."

"Aw hell," Miguel said, looking over at the doorway. Tim O'Neill walked in the door, looking like a lost puppy. He saw his friends, raised his hand--then stopped in mid wave. He sighed, then sat at the table furthest from them. "I'm mean--so he made a BAD judgment call--he's still our FRIEND, you guys."

Lucas shook his head. "He did a really shitty thing to Linn, Mig. Sorry, I can't forgive him for that one--til SHE does." He grabbed his mug. "I think I'm gonna head down to C deck."

Linn was exhausted--but that didn't matter. She was hunched over the computer console next to her bed. She didn't hear the first knock...or the second.

"Aislinn?" she heard muffled by the door.

Her jaw rippled. Tim. "Go AWAY," she shouted.

Tim sighed. It had been this way for over a month. She wouldn't talk to him. She would talk AT him, unless he addressed her as Lieutenant MacMurdo, and then only when it had something to do directly with a communications problem. Other than that, nothing. Even worse, no one ELSE could even mention his name to her without her either screaming in rage, or bolting in tears.

Tim never meant to hurt her this bad. He thought he was doing her a favor--it was obvious that a loser like him could never hold onto a girl that great forever. Why forestall the inevitable? She'd be better off with someone like Miguel Ortiz--or Jim Brody. Definitely Brody, with his charm and good looks befitting such a gorgeous woman. And it was obvious that Jim adored her--practically worshipped the ground she walked on. It would just be easier if he left without any word to her--so that she wouldn't try to talk him out of it. The Navy didn't need him...as much as he wanted it to. Why not just start over?

Granted, he had missed her like crazy the week or so he was gone. When he tried painting all those girls, all he wanted was for his long, leggy Linn to be the one in front of him, in her cute little blue suit--the one piece with the racing back and the dark green stripe across the chest, and the high cut legs--Tim smiled every time he though about her in that suit, her long wet hair swept back away from her face. And then he had flirted with Mariah--oh that had been a brilliant move! All the time he was captured, all he could do was think about Linn. Her smile, her laugh--the way she moved across a room--the way she nestled his arm around her shoulders or her waist every chance she got. How could he want to leave the only woman who could keep up with him linguistically--and in so many other things? She GOT him...when so many others couldn't even be bothered to see the walls he threw up...she climbed up over them to get to him...all with a single glance of her emerald green eyes.

Tim sighed, as he slid against the wall outside her quarters and sat on the floor. She had every right to hate his guts. He had done the one thing she could probably never forgive him for. He LEFT...without a word, without even a goodbye. Hell, he did know if he could forgive him--

"What do ye want?" he heard above him.

His head snapped upwards, startled out of his reverie. He bounced up and tried to straighten out his uniform.

Dear God, she was so beautiful. Her hair was loose, gently framing her face in chocolate waves. Her soft, sweet face, with the dimple in her chin that he loved so much. And her eyes--bright, shining, ripping into his very soul--and very, very red. Tim swallowed hard. He knew why her eyes were so red. She been crying. Again.

"Um--hi, Aislinn," he stammered. He wanted to just fall to his knees and beg forgiveness.

"Timothy," she nodded. It was the first time she has said his given name in seven weeks...the first time she could LET herself say it, and not immediately burst into tears.

"Ah--can we talk?" he asked.

She bored into him with her eyes. "Don'tcha think it's a bit LATE for that?" she replied, a snap to her voice.

Ouch, Tim thought. "I deserved that," he said.

"I'm so glad ye think so," she snapped.

He held his hands up. "Look, I'm not here to pick a fight with you."  
"So what ARE ye here for, Timothy?"

"Linnie--"

"DON'T," she whispered. Her pain throbbed into her voice as she said. "You lost the right to call me by a lover's name."

He recoiled at the vehemence of her tone. "So, how do I win it back?"

She looked at him. She missed him so--she loved him so. Tim was the answer to every prayer she had ever had. Tall, handsome, earnest, BRILLIANT. His deep brown eyes held a myriad of mysteries for her, and as she unraveled each one, she marveled at the complexity of the man called Tim O'Neill. He fascinated her in a way that no other had. She had forgotten one important thing, though--he was HUMAN...fallible...imperfect. And that had cost her in ways she never dreamed imaginable. He had never ached so over one of her fights with Oliver the way she ached now. And the stupidest thing was, she knew that Tim had honestly thought he was doing the right thing by just leaving. He though it would spare him some imagined pain--because he didn't deserve her. Or so he thought. She loved him, loved him with everything she was, and had the potential to be. Potential HE unknowingly drove her to fulfill. She wanted to feel his arms around her right now, cradling her, soothing her. She wanted him back so bad.

But what about the NEXT time? What happened when his demons came to haunt him again, and he decided to run? If he couldn't let her in enough to help him battle them--then maybe he didn't love her as much as he claimed he did. And she couldn't live with that. She wanted all of Tim O'Neill--or nothing at all.

"You don't," she said finally.

Tim felt like somebody slapped him across the face.

"What--ye though ye were jus' gonna beg forgiveness on bended knee, come in here, make love to me, and it would all be better?" she said. "You LEFT--not a word, NOTHING. I had to hear about it from TONY? TONY! I though you LOVED me!"

"I DO!" he cried, grabbing her elbow.

"Let go of me," she said, her voice ice cold.

He did as he was asked.

"I thought you loved me, Timothy," she said again. "But, I was wrong. You don't love anyone--not even yerself. Yer a heartless, selfish baby, Timothy Andrew O'Neill." The fought the tears from slipping down her cheek--and failed. She knew how her words were ripping his soul apart. They were demolishing hers, just saying them.

"Linn--" he said brokenly.

She shook her head once. "It's OVER, Timothy. Completely."

Tim sighed. He HAD to play this one last card. He pulled out her pin...the silver dolphin she had given so long ago--the pin he had carried on him for nearly three years. The etching was gone--it had been touched and caressed so often. But the metal shone, because Tim lovingly cleaned it once a week--by hand. He held it out in his hand and extended it to her.

"Then--I guess you want this back, huh?" He had offered it back once before, and she had handed it back to him, and hugged him, and they had talked for hours, repairing and rebuilding their friendship. He hoped it would have the same effect.

She looked at her pin--the etching was gone, but the silver shone in the light of the hall. She knew that it was the most precious thing Tim owned....the only reason it had survived the destruction of the first seaQuest was because it had been in his pocket. She knew why he was bringing it out now--it was his last resort. She had given him that--as a way for him to remember her by. But it had become a symbol of their relationship. Silver tarnished easily--it had to be cared for. Not unlike the love between a man and a woman. She had given him her love so long ago---and he was offering it back. Hoping she wouldn't reach for the pin--that she wouldn't take back all she had given him.

"I suppose I do," she said. And reached out and covered the pin with her hand and slipped it out of his hand, their palms touching for the last time.

Tim was dumbstruck. "You're--you can't--Li--"

She shook her head. "Goodbye, Timothy," she said. And closed the door of her quarters.

Tim stood staring at her door for long seconds. Then he turned. And then he turned back, slammed his fists against her door and screamed, "NOOOOOOOO!" in a voice that echoed his longing and pain and sorrow.

Linn didn't hear it. She was too busy clutching the tiny silver dolphin in her hand and sobbing hysterically.


	2. Chapter 2

Word about the break up had traveled fast. It might have been a big boat but it wasn't all that big. Besides, those who didn't hear could read it on their faces.

Tim was miserable. He worked, he ate his meals. And after that, he went to his quarters. And sat. He didn't go out with his friends, he wouldn't play poker. Every time he saw Aislinn, everyone noticed the dual look of wistful longing and abject misery in his eyes.

Funny thing was Linn was even more miserable than Tim. She worked but was almost never seen in the mess hall. She ate when none of her other friends were around...not even Lucas. She spent all her free time at the moonpool, and even Darwin avoided her, after he had called her 'Dreamy' once, and she screamed at him to get away from her.

"They're ripping themselves apart, Nathan," Wendy Smith told Captain Bridger during their weekly crew evaluation.

"The lousy thing is they're both working to their normal standards--even better than normal for MacMurdo," Bridger said.

"Linn immerses herself in her work when she gets upset," Wendy said. "But what worries me is Tim. His low level psychic ability is wreaking havoc on me, on Darwin...and Dagwood."

"Really?" Bridger leaned forward.

"It's taking all my skills to block out his sorrow," she said. "He's beyond heartbroken--he feels like he doesn't have a heart anymore."

Nathan stroked his beard. "In a real way, this whole thing is MY fault. I sent him off on that leave."

"You didn't make the decision for him to go, Nathan," Wendy pointed out. "Tim still made the choice to leave."

"So what can I do?" Bridger asked.

"Play daddy to two very hurt youngsters," Wendy replied.

Linn was at the moonpool again, her hand drifting along in the water. She heard a noise behind her, and turned quickly.

It was Dagwood.

"I'm sorry, Linnie," he said. "I was cleaning. I will go away now."

"No, Dag, please," she said. "Don't leave on my account. Finish up."

The Dagger looked at her carefully. "Everyone says you want to be alone--even Darwin."

Linn nodded her head. "Well--I do. But not just right now, OK?" She smiled at him. Gentle Dagwood was the only member of the seaQuest crew who had been spared her fury. She always had a special place in her heart for the GELF. She patted a spot next to her. "It's OK, Dagwood," she said gently. "I won't yell at you. I promise."

Dagwood slowly put his mop down and then sat next to her. "You have been very sad," he said.

She nodded. "Yes. I have been."

"Tim is sad, too."

She winced at the mention of his name, but she again smiled sadly. "Yes...he's been very sad too."

Dagwood thought hard for a minute, trying to make the words fit what he felt. "I think--that you and Tim--are sad because you miss each other."

Linn smiled. Only Dagwood could see right through all the excuses to the heart of the matter. "I do miss him, Dagwood."

"Do you still--love Tim, Linnie?"

She nodded. "Yes. Very much."

Dagwood frowned. "I do not understand," he said. "If you love Tim, why are you mad at him?"

Linn paused for a minute, fighting the urge to go off in a wild tirade. Dagwood didn't know. He did but not in the way that the other--she wanted to put it in terms that he would grasp easily. "Well," she said. "Sometimes, the people we love...they do things that make us mad."

Dagwood nodded. "Sometimes, Darwin gets me wet."

Linn smiled and patted his hand. "Well, sort of like that. But sometimes, the thing is really, REALLY stupid. And it just doesn't make you mad--it hurts."

Dagwood blinked.

"Like--" Linn struggled to find an image. "Like when Tony spilled soda all over Lucas' keyboard? Remember how mad Lucas was at Tony?"

"But, Lucas and Tony are still friends," Dagwood pointed out.

Linn chewed her bottom lip. "I don't know if I can explain this, Dag," she said.

Dagwood though very hard again. "You love Tim," he said. "But Tim left."

"And that hurt me," she said. "Very, very much."

"But-mmm-Tim LOVES you," Dagwood said.

Linn shook her head. "I don't know if he does, anymore. Why would he leave me?"

Dagwood shook his head. "I don't know--"

"And not even TELL me?"

Dagwood nodded. "That--hurt?"

Linn nodded again, tears slipping down her cheeks. "Very, VERY much." She felt the tears, and wiped them away.

"Sometimes, when I am scared," Dagwood said, "I cry."

Linn smiled and touched his mottled cheek. "I think I've done enough cryin' over Tim O'Neill, Dagwood," she said.

Dagwood's brow furrowed. "Have you cried for YOU, Linnie?"

Her eyes opened wide. "I'm scared that if I start," she whispered, "I won't want to stop. I don't want to cry alone anymore."

Dagwood took a deep breath, and wrapped his arms around Linn. "You can cry. I will be here--until you finish."

She took a deep breath, fighting the sorrow back.. She was a MacMurdo, she was supposed to be strong...stronger than this...and then she started sobbing, the tears rushing from her eyes, her throat burning from the sobs. "I love him SO much, Dagwood!" she wept.

"You should tell him..."

"I cannae," she wept. "I said such hateful things t'him..."

"Tim loves you, too--that is why he is sad too...he wants to hold you."

Linn shook her head, the tears subsiding some. "I've lost him, Dagwood...I should accept that."

Dagwood shook his head. "You should not give up like that."

She smiled sadly. "I don't think I have a choice." She buried her head in the GELF's chest, glad her friend was here. "Just till the shaking goes away, Dag," she mumbled.

Tim sat on his bed, his head between his knees. It helped the headaches...some. He had such horrible headaches now--ever since Linn had thrown him out of her life. This wasn't a break-up, he thought bitterly. This was a rip-up. That how he felt. RIPPED in half and thrown back together. NOTHING felt right anymore--work was a chore to occupy time. And after the work was done--all there was left was for him to think. Think about what he had done to her--about how much he missed her. Dr. Smith refused to give him anymore sleeping pills--so even sleep wasn't an option anymore. At least in his dreams, they were still together. Things were the way they were supposed to be in his dreams. There were days he didn't want to wake up, as he swore he could feel her honey flavored lips press themselves against his own.

He groaned as he lay back on the bed. The longing didn't diminish, it intensified. The sorrow intensified too. Tim didn't know if he could do this anymore. Ever since the scene outside her door, he had kept his distance. It seemed to be what she wanted, and Tim was too ashamed to even attempt to try to talk with her again. He fought the urge to literally throw himself at her feet every time he saw her pass in the hallway, and beg her to take him back. Lucas STILL wouldn't speak to him...Brody barely did so. Miguel tried his best, to keep Tim's mind off things, but there was only so much his best friend could do for him. Tim looked out of his porthole at the water in the tubes. How many night had he lain in this spot, listening to her soft breathing, her hair tickling his chin, her arms wrapped around him?

Tim pushed himself off the bed. Sitting here sulking wasn't going to help any. He had to get away from the memories--the ghosts. He put his shoes on and zipped up the front of his uniform. Maybe Tony had a poker game going.

"Anybody seen Linn?" Lucas asked. "She was supposed to meet me in C deck."

It had been nearly a week since anybody had seen her more than five minutes outside the bridge. She had rebuffed all efforts to be drawn out of her shell--and combined with her reclusiveness, everybody was worried.

"Sorry, Lucas," Jon Ford said. He sat, as he usually did, with Brody, Piccolo and Ortiz.

"Man, I can't believe it's been two months," Tony started to say.

Ortiz held up his hand. "Tony, don't even start," he said wearily.

"Ya gotta admit, Mig--"

"Piccolo," Miguel warned. Then he sighed. "She thinks he doesn't love her anymore--"

Lucas snorted as he sat. "She's RIGHT."

Mig gave him a hard look. "Tim ADORES her, and you know it, Wolenczak." Ortiz sighed again. "Problem is, he thinks he DESERVES the pain. He won't go anywhere near her---"

"He's right," Lucas said.

"Not according to Dagwood," Tony said. "Sez he had a little chat with Linnie--she's still nuts about O'Neill." At the looks of astonishment, he said, "Hey, he came to ME, askin' how to make her feel better. She's pretty tore up."

"Great," Brody said. "Our friends are miserable, and all WE can do is sit around and gossip about it."

"Holy--" Tony breathed.

Linn was in the doorway of the mess hall. Her eyes were dull and bloodshot. Her uniform hung on her like a sack and her long hair looked limp and lifeless. Her feet looked too big for her body, as she dragged herself towards an empty table, her eyes scanning the room.

"Linn!" Lucas called out, trying to hide the fear in his voice. She looked like hell.

"Och, there ye are," she said wearily. Even her voice showed her state--it was a listless as the rest of her. "Boyos," she nodded at the others.

"Hey Bookworm," Piccolo said, hoping to get a rise out of her.

She just smiled. "Nice try, Tony," she said. "A for effort."

Brody winced. "Sit down already, Mac," he said, pushing Tony out of his seat and offering it to her.

She shook her head. " Tis OK, Jimmy," she said. "M' not stayin' long." Her words were slurring together, like she was drunk.

"Linn, are you OK?" Ford asked, touching her arm gently.

She shrugged her shoulders. "As well as kin be expected, I suppose, Jono," she said. "Now, if ye all will excuse me and Luke, we've some work to finish. Lucas?"

Lucas looked at his friends, shrugged his shoulders and followed Linn off to an empty table.

"You want something to eat, Linn?" Lucas asked.

She shook her head. "No. I'm really not all that hungry, lad," she said. "How's that glitch in the software?"

Lucas shook his head. "I found the error in the code, but FIXING it? Well that's a different story."

As Lucas launched into his tech-laden explanation, Linn barely listened. She had this detached feeling...and it was so hot in here. Maybe she should eat--but nothing had stayed down for days--why was the room spinning so fast? What was happening to her--she felt so odd.

Lucas looked at Linn for a second, realizing that she hadn't heard a word he had just said. "Aislinn?" He touched her hand, and flinched. It was clammy--and hot.

She blinked owlishly. "I--I dinnae feel so good, Lucas," she whispered. She brought a hand to her forehead, her eyes closed. She could have swore she saw Tim--in a shimmery, heat-feverish sort of haze. "Maybe--I should--" She toppled over, her head cracking the edge of the table and opening a gash in her head.

"LINN!" Lucas heard someone exclaim, but he wasn't able to get to her.

Tim O'Neill had caught her before she hit the floor.

"Tim," she muttered in her feverish state. "Tim--"

"I'm right here, darling," he whispered. Looking around, he screamed, "Somebody get me a cloth or something!"

Miguel had already run to the kitchen and gotten a clean cloth. Tim took it and pressed it to the cut on her head. "Ssshh, I'm here, it's OK."

Ford had activated his PAL and called for the medics. Everyone in the mess hall crowded around, trying to see if she was OK, but Ford pushed them all back. "Give the lady some space! Back off, guys!"

"Tim," she murmured again, her face pale and streaked with blood and sweat. "Tim--"

"I'm right here, Aislinn," he said. He kept the pressure on the cloth on her head, and carefully laid her head against him. "It's gonna be OK, Linnie," he kept saying.

"I don't think she can hear--" Lucas started to say.

Brody shook his head. "Lucas, shush."

As the medics got there, Tim assisted them, holding her head as they rolled her on the backboard, and lifted her onto the stretcher. He left with them, one hand firmly pressed on the cloth on her head, the other touching her face.

"How is she, Doctor?' Bridger asked. He wasn't the only one hovering over Dr. Wendy Smith's patient. Lucas and Ford were there. Tim O'Neill was seated on MacMurdo's bed, clasping one of her hands. Lucas and Jonathan were two of Aislinn's best friends.

They had all been in the mess hall when she had pitched over and out of her chair, cracking her head on the table.

"Not good," she said. "Between the concussion, and the stitches, she has a fever of 102, and she's severely malnourished. Her electrolyte balances are haywire."

"So what happened?" Lucas asked, impatiently.

"She's not--well, you know," Bridger stammered and glanced at O'Neill, trying to be diplomatic.

"No," Smith grinned, "she's not pregnant, Captain. She and Tim are--were--very responsible."

Bridger sighed. "Sorry, Tim," he said. Even with the rift that had grown between Tim and Aislinn, there was always the possibility. It had only been two months, after all.

"No problem, sir," O'Neill said, his eyes never leaving MacMurdo's face. "It was a thought, too."

Ford looked at the Communications officer. "I thought she was on--the--" he started to say, then realized that Lucas was staring at him.

"On the what?" he asked.

Tim and Jonathan looked at each other. "Never mind, Lucas," Tim said, finally starting to blush.

"What--the pill? God, guys, I'm nineteen, not five. I know all about where babies--"

"So what is wrong with Linnie?" Ford asked, bringing the conversation back.

"She's exhausted," Smith said. "Like I said, her electrolyte levels are haywire...it looks like she hasn't had a decent night's sleep in who knows when--same thing goes for a decent meal."

Everyone looked at Tim. Tim looked at his feet.

"Anyway," Smith continued, "What Lt. MacMurdo needs now is a long, peaceful shore leave. She needs to catch up on her sleep, and not be tempted to work, or be under ANY undue emotional stress," she said, giving the four men in the room very hard looks. "But first, I have to get her stabilized enough to even leave the seaQuest."

"Hmmm--" they all heard. "Tim?" Aislinn whispered, squeezing the hand that was holding hers.

"Hey, Sis," Lucas said, not bothering to hiding his relief.

Tim let go of her hand quickly and motioned for Lucas to take his place, before her eyes completely opened, and crossed the room out of her range of vision. He was the last thing she needed to see.

 _You're wrong, Tim,_ he heard. He looked at Dr. Smith, and she smiled at him. _All she's doing is thinking about you._

He closed his eyes, shaking his head.

"Luke? Wha'--what happened?" she whispered.

"You passed out, kiddo," Jonathan said, sitting on the opposite side of her, across from Lucas.

Her eyes closed for a second. "I never pass out," she whined.

"Looks like we pushed you too hard, Mac," Lucas said. "I knew we shoulda quit working early today."

"All I remember was hitting my head."

"You cracked it but good," Jon said.

"Wendy?' she said weakly.

"Seventeen stitches," she said. "You've got a minor concussion."

"Och, hellfire," she muttered. Then she tried to turn her head. "Where--where is he?"

"Ssssh, Linn," Bridger said. "Don't get panicky--"

"Tim--he was here," she said, trying to sit up. "I could hear him, I know I could."

"Linn you've got to calm down," Lucas begged. "Dr. Smith's going to have to sedate you if you--"

"Tim," she sobbed.

Wendy looked at Tim, and motioned her head towards the bed. Go to her, Tim. She needs you.

Tim O'Neill did something he never had done before. He answered Dr. Smith's thought--in his own mind. _What if--_

 _She NEEDS you, Tim--Now go, or I am going to have to sedate her._ The older woman smiled. _Go to her, Tim._

"Tim. He was HERE, Lucas, I know he was," Linn said, clutching his arm. "He was here the whole time, why has he gone--"

"I haven't," Tim said, coming into her view for the first time. "I'm here, Linn."

She stretched out her arm, the one without the IV tubes. "Tim," she whispered. Her fingers reached for him, stretching to meet him.

Tim took a step forward. He took her hand in his. She pulled on it, with what little strength she had.

Tim closed his eyes. Lucas got off the edge of the bed where Tim had put him. He placed a hand on Tim's shoulder and squeezed. Tim nodded. He sat on the bed, where Linn pulled his hand to her face and kissed it.

"Um, maybe we'll come back and check on your patient another time, Doctor," Bridger said diplomatically. He looked at Ford. Jon nodded, and leaned down to kiss Linn on the forehead. "Feel better, OK?"

She nodded and smiled.

Bridger and Ford left, leaving Wendy, Tim and Linn in the room.

"I'm going to go write up some orders for you, Linn," she said. "Tim, keep an eye on her for me, OK?"

Tim nodded. "Sure, Doctor Smith."

And then, there was just Tim and Linn.

She held his hand to her face, loving the coolness of it against her hot skin. She kissed it over and over, her lips upturned in a smile. "Ye came," she whispered. "I was calling ye, and ye came."

He choked, and gently kissed her hand. "I'm here," he said. "I'll stay as long as you want me to."

She looked up into his dark eyes. "Forever, Tim, stay with me forever," she pleaded. She touched his face, his lips, over and over.

Tim sobbed and he kissed her forehead. He rested his own against hers, their intertwined hands against his cheek. "I'm so sorry, Aislinn," he sobbed. "I never meant--"

"Shhh," she said, putting a finger to his lips. "Doesn't matter--yer here now."

He started crying and held her to his chest, rocking her gently. "You don't deserve a louse like--"

"I love you, Tim," she said.

"Oh Linn," he sighed, "I love you. I never STOPPED loving you. I'll ALWAYS love you." He kissed her once, softly.

She looked up at him, her green eyes cloudy with fatigue and pain. "You'll stay?" she asked in a small voice.

Tim nodded as he climbed into the bed with her, letting her rest her head on his chest. "Yeah, ashulla, I'll stay."

Tim practically moved into Medbay. Since he was not going to be allowed to take leave with Linn, he took a week off to be with her in Medbay. Not only did Wendy Smith not complain, she had practically ORDERED Bridger to sign off on it, reminding him that, technically, he owed Tim three weeks worth of leave.

For the first time in weeks, Tim had fallen asleep with Linn in his arms, and he thought he had died and gone to heaven. They didn't make love--they were both to shy to even try to in the mostly public Medbay...even though Linn was its only occupant in the evening save the medic on duty. Instead, they talked. About the reasons Tim had left, about the pain it caused both of them. He haltingly told her about Mariah, and how she had gotten him to turn over the code of the seaQuest. And how guilty that made him feel.

"There's was nothing you could do," Linn had said.

"Yeah, there was," Tim said bitterly. "I could have stayed my ass HOME."

Linn kissed him. "Yer here NOW, that's all that matters to me," she said.

Tim kissed her hair. "I want to promise I'll never, ever leave you again," he said, "but I'm scared to. What if I screw up?"

She smiled. "How about, ye just promise to come to me the next time you feel like that?" she replied. "Or, at least CALL me, to tell me yer off wandering...so I dinnae worry TOO much."

Tim chuckled. "Deal," he said.

"And no more flirting with other women," she teased.

"There are other women?" Tim asked.

"Och, yer not funny, O'Neill," she said.

"I know," he said. "But I still love you."

She smiled, snuggling closer to him. "Well, that's all right, then," she said.

"I'll keep track of how maneuvers are going," Linn MacMurdo said. Ford, Wolenczak, and O'Neill had escorted her to the launch that was heading up to UEO headquarters in Cape New Quest, where she would head out to the house they all called Poseidon's Point. It had been nearly a week since her collapse in the mess hall. The bruise on her forehead was still purplish, but the concussion was gone. She had been eating solid food for three days, and though still thin, her skin and eyes had regained their glow rather quickly.

"Don't you dare," said Ford. "You might break doctor's orders just to get in on the fun."

She smacked his arm. "Verrrry funny, Jono," she said, letting loose her deep Scottish brogue. He messed her hair.

"I'll try and finish that program before you get back," Lucas said, hugging her.

She kissed the teen on the cheek. "Just remember the by line on the paper reads 'Wolenczak AND MacMurdo'?"

"Would I stiff you?" he teased.

"I've seen you play poker," she retorted.

"That's only with Tony," he shot back. "Stiffing you is like stiffing my mother or something," he grinned.

"Why you--" She swatted his butt.

Then she turned to Tim.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I wish you were coming with me."

He pulled her close. "I am going to miss you so much," he breathed into her hair. He though he was going to go crazy for two weeks without her, one of those weeks in radio silence topside while the seaQuest ran annual war games with the fleet. "I'll call the minute we clear radio silence." After everything that had happened between them--he didn't know if her could handle another separation. But it would be alright. She loved him. Once she got back home, everything would be OK, again. He kissed her gently, savoring the feel of her lips against his. "Come home soon, OK, Linnie?" he asked.

She nodded. "I will. Try not to sink the boat while I'm gone, ye daft lads," she said as she went into the launch. She was almost down the ladder before she remembered something. She scrambled back up, relieved to find Tim lagging behind Lucas and Jonathan. "TIM! WAIT!"

Tim turned towards the sound of her voice. "Linnie! You're gonna miss--"

"I forgot," she said, huffing. She stuck her hand in her pocket. When she brought it back out, she opened it for him to see.

The silver dolphin was lying in her hand.

She smiled as she took it and pinned it on his collar, right under his lieutenant's stripes. "To remember me by," she said, and kissed his cheek.

Tim smiled, and caressed her cheek. "Like I could ever forget YOU, MacMurdo." He kissed her once on the lips, lingering, memorizing the feel of her lips, the way she tasted, the pattern of her breathing, to see him through the long night without her. He finally pulled away, his eyes glowing. "Now scoot, before I follow you on that launch."

She smiled, then snapped to attention and saluted. "Aye, Lieutenant O'Neill, sir!"

He shook his head. "It wasn't Lieutenant O'Neill asking, ye daft girl," he replied, in a imitation of her brogue.

She grinned wickedly, and planted one last kiss on Tim. The last time he had come that close to swooning was the first time Linn had ever kissed him. "Well," she said breathlessly, "when he decides to show up, give him that for me, will ya?"

"Sure thing," he said, swatting her butt.

She laughed, then headed back towards the launch. "Timothy Andrew?" she said as he turned back towards the hatch.

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

Tim's heart melted. He gave her his most winning smile. "I love you too, Aislinn Elizabeth," he said. "Just come home to me."

She threw herself into his arms. The kiss lasted for a long time. "Jus' be here for me to come home to," she said, when she finally pulled away from him, their fingers slipping apart. She blew him a last kiss, and she memorized his lopey grin, the deep onyx of his eyes, the curve of his slight lips...and smiled as he gave her a sad half wave in farewell as she lost sight of him, as she descended down the ladder to the launch.

She never dreamed it would be the last time she ever saw him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After this story, seaQuest disappeared for ten years. There is an entire series devoted to the aftermath of that event. I am working on reformatting it for this platform.

**Author's Note:**

> The seaQuest and her crew all belong to Amblin Television...except for Lt. Aislinn MacMurdo, who is an original creation. Please be kind and remember that these fics were originally written over 20 years ago now.


End file.
